An old post with random thoughts.

So I was playing Minecraft last night, and as I was mindlessly breaking apart cobblestone I like to have the Minecraft IRC on my other moniter to talk about the game with other players or just chat about random stuff. Eventually the conversation flowed into evolution as it always seems to do in chat rooms at one time or another. I am not a big fan of discussing philosophy. I've spent too many days wasting my time on stupid theories with "intelligent" stoners. Ones who think they are helping the planet by discussing the existence of intelligent design, or how gravity affects the bong they are smoking out of, without basing any of it on scientific fact. Regardless, I can't help but voice my opinion in chat rooms, or in games when these topics come up, simply because the internet (and how uninhibited people are on it) fascinates me.

One of the users brought up that it's the "fittest" that are eventually going to survive. I made the quick assumption he meant physically and replied that I think the intelligent and innovative are the only hope we have of progressing as a species. He shot back that it could go either way.

I find it a little hard to believe I am wrong. I feel it can't really be argued that technological innovation (or lack thereof) will not have one of the greatest roles in our future. I believe their are a few things holding us back from that innovation. Mainly greed and not sharing the same beliefs/values. But before I get into that, I wanted to mention "luck".

Another user amidst this conversation brought up that "luck" will play a large part in our evolution. My obvious first response was to tell him "luck" is just a human facade. A fancy word for CHANCE. I think it's safe to say that anyone who thinks their are external forces that will change the outcome of a situation with 50/50 odds is a moron. Now obviously their are things that we can try to predict by watching patterns. In weather, the movement of tectonic plates, ect. We also have sensors to detect planets and their movements, and warn us of meteors and other threats, ect. So of course their is a "chance" that some things will happen and some things wont, and we should try to allocate our resources in certain areas to try to work it to our advantage.

But onto what I think it probably the biggest detriment to us progressing as a race. Greed. And I don't want greed to be confused with survivability. Obviously people do what they need to survive, and selfishness sometimes goes with that hand in hand. If you've seen "A Beautiful Mind" or know anything about the Nash Equilibrium, what I'm getting at is to do not what is best for you, but best for you AND everyone else.

Greed is the staple of how our societies are run. It's one of the most notable and pronounced of human traits, seen from children on the playground, to relationships, to our world leaders. Everyone wants to live comfortably, which is fine. Where the problem lies, I believe, is how people think they should achieve that. People are so intent that what they think is "the right way" and everyone else should agree. Greed and difference are what is causing our wars, our conflicts , a lot of our poverty, and prejudices. Obviously money is one of the largest factors in this greed. But it's also control of the people, land, resources, technology, religion. Everyone thinks their way is right, and they do whatever it takes to prove it, and get things the way they want. They will kill, they will steal, they will violate rights. Whatever it takes.

Now I'm not entirely sure what the solution to this is. Of course this isn't going to change overnight. Their is a lot going wrong in the world. A lot of bad people, doing very bad things. And mostly, it's for selfish gain. If all the people that actually control our world realize that the best way to thrive as a race is cooperation, or even if all the citizens who blindly follow them realize this, we will be much better off. Maybe an external threat has a hope. I discuss this a lot with my brother. If something is threatening our world SO gravely, that as a race we MUST work together to survive it a lot of eyes might be opened. And I mean a CLEAR threat. An invading species would be the first I think of. Something telling us our ENTIRE earth and it's survival depend solely on us setting aside our differences for the time being, and struggling together, with everyone having the same goals in mind.

It infuriates me to think what we are doing with our world. If we took a quarter of the resources we put into fighting each other and put it into technological advancement we could be so much further along. Spent it on science, medicine. On space exploration. Biodomes. Self-sustaining environments. Reducing fossil fuels. Renewable resources. We could have been living on the damn moon YEARS ago. We have been fighting each other for so long over money, beliefs, values, traditions, morals. I wonder if we are ever gonna see a time when, at least as a world in general, we are working together.

Anyways, I realize I'm not treading new ground here. People have been talking about this for ages it's just that lately it seems to be in my mind a lot and I needed to get it out. I have lots of other stuff on my mind but it's a little scattered.

I encourage you to tell me how you feel about this, or if you'd like to add/argue anything. I could use some provoking.

Nerds are Everywhere....

I was listening to a podcast the other day and they brought up an interesting subject about nerds. Now when most people think of the term “Nerd” they are most likely going to see one of two things in their heads. First, they see a secluded, intelligent “bookworm”, maybe skinny with glasses that knows the first 500 numbers in Pi. They think of someone who can solve a Rubik’s cube in less than a minute while blindfolded and simultaneously playing Fur Elise with their feet. Whatever. Another person is going to see a tech nerd. Maybe someone more commonly referred to as a geek. This is someone who can put together a computer in an hour, devotes a copious amount of time isolating themselves and playing videogames in their parents’ basement and can list off all of the major space bearing vessels in the entire Star Trek legacy. I fall under the latter of these two. What most people don’t notice is how they are surrounded by them every time they go down to the local watering hole on a Sunday evening.

Wikipedia defines a “Nerd” as “a term that refers to a social perception of a person who avidly pursues intellectual activities, technical or scientific endeavors, esoteric knowledge, or other obscure interests, rather than engaging in more social or conventional activities.”. Now I don’t entirely agree with that as I, simply put, would couple “Nerd” with “Obsession”.
Think about the last time you went to dinner at a bar and a football game comes on. You might observe a group of people sporting all their favorite jerseys, team colors, face paints and arguing over a player’s touchdown ratio or dissecting the last season of games trying to predict who is going to win. How is this any different than any stereotyped “Nerds” you see talking about the latest game releases or how fast the new GPU is in their new computer? I don’t see it. While gaming and geek culture is becoming more prominent than almost anything (1 out of 8 households in North America has a copy of the new Call of Duty), it is still looked upon as a negative thing. A group of avid hockey fans will make fun of a group of Sony fans all dressed up as their favorite characters waiting in line for a new console. Then they go back to their buddies and pound out fantasy leagues. What about that is so much “cooler” than obsessing over anything else?
Things are starting to change though. Nintendo has pretty much put a game console in every damn household with the massive success of the Wii. You be hard pressed to find any mother in North America that doesn’t know what it is. You could barely find them for more than a year because they were getting snatched up off of shelves so quickly. A game like Black Ops has the largest entertainment launch in history, making Activision over 550 million dollars in the first five days of release. Although I must say there is a large gap between the Halo and Call of Duty players and the average gamer, but that’s another topic.
I feel like the bridge is getting smaller, and the whole “nerd” perception is becoming less of a negative term. But when the hell am I going to be able to watch a Halo or Starcraft 2 competition on my TV every few weeks? The whole scene is blowing up fast, and I can’t wait till the perception is gone and the media starts realizing that not only do we have just as much passion as a sports fanatic, but there are mad amounts of cash to be made.

This has gone on much longer than intended and I still have lots to say but I’ll leave it at that. Leave a comment, whether it is to ask a question or to demean my writing. Both are encouraged.
Expect more content soon, maybe a review?
Or leave a comment and follow me on Twitter @Sabin2k

Rough story intro

I woke up with Greed resting her head on my neck. She gently nudged me and whispered in my ear.

"What do you want most in the world?"

I didn't know how to answer.

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Walking up the cement stairs out of my apartment and feeling the moisture on my skin is always a welcome "Hello". Rain rarely hits the ground in this place. With how hot this city can be I decided for a place almost underground. I should be asking myself how the I woke up from what I can only assume was a dream, or at least something I created. The details are fading every second. All I can clearly remember is her face, smooth skin and comforting green eyes. I strain to remember the house and the people. The conversations I had are all mixed it up. It went all wrong though. Quickly.

I was headed to Mandolins for a coffee, which is something I usually do when I am thinking. Mandolins is a very calming place. A small coffee shop on the corner of my street. I sat down in one of the few chairs. They always have dangerously cute girls working here, who I always feebly attempt to flirt with, usually resulting in disappointment. I walked to the counter as a young girl I knew came out of the back room with some large boxes in her arms. Her face was hidden but I recognized the smell of her perfume. She is small, thin, with shoulder length black hair and her bangs are cut short around her eyes.

“Hey Jess” I said as I reached across the counter and grabbed a cup from beneath the cashier.

 “I get paid to serve you coffee you know, Ethan.” She replied, gently placing the boxes in front of the coffee makers.

“But I like this cup.”

I filled up my cup with coffee and sat down on one of the stools and looked back up at as she started to unload bags of coffee from the boxes up onto to the shelves above the machines. I have known Jess for years. She had been working at Mandolins for a year when I moved into the city. We never spend any time together outside, so I’ve only really seen her wear her green apron and blue jeans. I was very interested in her when we met, but after awhile we just kind of just became outlets for each other when we wanted to talk about something. She was the exception to the rest of the girls that hung around here.

“Any luck finding work?” She asked.

She hit some buttons on the till, opened it and then closed it again without depositing anything. I never pay for my coffee here.

“You know I don’t need to work.” I smiled at her and put some more sugar in my coffee. "My parents have left me more than I could ever need." 

“Don't you live in a small apartment on Lexin?" She teased, pulling up a stool to join me at the counter.

"Yes, but I've been trying to get away form the luxuries that I grew up with." I shot back.

"Well it would be good for you. All you do is roam the city. At least find a hobby or something.” She said with a slight smile.

“Roaming is my hobby. A lot of interesting things happen around here.” I replied, grabbing a copy of the The Estis Daily News.

"Well we are the largest capital in the country" She noted.

I took a look at the front page. In the main column was a picture of a small pile of blue pills. They were the size of a dime and etched in to the middle of each one was a symbol.

“Here we go.” I said, folding out the paper on the counter. Jess went back behind the counter to fill up the coffee machines as I began to read the small caption below the picture.

“Estis City Police have been investigating what appears to be a new pill that is being created in the underground. We have not been able to get any more information from the department but will be making  investigations into the new drug and will report any news as it surfaces."

Note - More needs be added here

I am supposed to be finding some sort of employment, although it is hardly necessary. I have enough money in my account to afford me, along with a few others, a long lifetime of care free living. I always find it unfair that I should be given so much opportunity. All based on chance. Typical story. Born to rich parents. They were killed in an unsolved homicide. When I say unsolved, in no way do I mean that their was ever much of an investigation. I still haven't found out what they did or why they seemed to be victims of such loathing by, well, everyone around them. Despite all that, the result was me growing up with a very indulgent lifestyle. Never really longing for anything, as almost anything I could think of was easily attainable. I can safely say I've experienced more of what is out there than mostly anyone my age. Which is 18, by the way. It isn't too hard to find time for travel when your name is pretty much paying for your honor roll.

I was walking home from downtown late last night, when I heard raised voices from a group of men one street over. I decided to take a detour in their direction. People fascinate me, and I usually take any opportunity I can to understand how we think the way we do. Just as I was approaching the dim street corner they were standing at, I heard a sobbing voice quietly trying to raise her voice back at the men. She sounded scared.

“Hello gentlemen. Having a good evening?” I said calmly to the back of the first man.

There were three of them. It sounded like a large group of them from where I was standing earlier.

“Things are starting to look up” One of them replied.

I could tell he was already grinning before he slowly turned his head around, locking eyes with me. The man on the right had a knife in his hand, but I wasn’t sure at the time. I got cautious. Just as I was about to ask them what they had intended to get from conversing with the girl, the man swung at me. I broke his arm in 3 places and grabbed the knife as the others lunged at me. I stabbed them both. One in the femur and the other in the stomach. Just enough so they couldn’t walk.

“What are you doing out here by yourself?” I asked the girl. 

I said it calmly. I didn’t wait for an answer and tossed the knife to the ground by her feet. I started back towards the street I was on. Still about 10 blocks from home. It was getting late. That's when I heard sirens. I sighed.

Now here I am.

I’m waiting for the officers to fill out paperwork and come get a statement from me. As far as they know I had assaulted the men without cause. The girl somehow managed to avoid running into the police. I don't blame her for avoiding them. She knows very well those men that were harassing her are not the only evils in the world. I know this too. After about 45 minutes I hear them finally coming back. I have been smoking cigarettes this whole time. Not that I am anxious, but these plain interrogation rooms bore me, and they took my damn phone. The cops must have brought up the other mens records. They all got handcuffed and brought to the cells, no doubt with some court orders being written up.

“Your free to leave” The officer said after opening the door. He didn't even step inside.

“Excuse me?”

“Have a good evening, sir” He said and closed the door.

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Her breath was cold on my neck. I was shivering as she placed her frozen fingers on the back of my spine, cutting deep into my skin with her nails. Everything was cold except the steady stream of blood between our chests, running down my waist and collecting on the floor. I always knew it would end this way. I fought so hard to avoid it but always knew it would come to this, just as it had all began. A beautiful girl, confused and betrayed. I know she didn't deserve this. Neither one if them did. They were self-less and caring. Thoughtful and intelligent.

I watched the focus fade from her eyes and saw her tears freezing to her cheek.

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I open my eyes and things begin to focus. I see her. She doesn't belong here and I tell her so. She walks around me without shifting her eyes from mine. Through the green I can see vengeance. She puts her hands on shoulders and leans her head to my ear.

"How can you be so sure?" She whispers.

I reply.

"By the softness of your voice. By the feeling of your rough hands. By the small scar on your neck."

I breathe in.

"And your eyes."

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Writing Prompts - Thoughts on Networking.

 80 Journal Writing Prompts #1 - Found at http://www.tomslatin.com/80-journal-writing-prompts/

All credit to him for the prompts.

Prompt: Name something you lost or gave away that can never be replaced.


I have lost many great things over the years. After all, I am quite careless. This has become so frequent and expected I can't even think of something important I may have lost or given away.  I've never really been attached to my possessions, with some exceptions. The most notable would have to be technology. I lose my mind without my computer. If I don't have my phone on me, the thought of getting it back consumes me. Of course, this isn't surprising these days. I think it is safe to say most people share this "problem" with me. We live in a world of constant connectivity, whether it be to friends, information, news or media in general. We are consumers. We consume. The faster and more efficient the better. I don't find this to be a problem for me. Some people seem to carry this stigma that this desire to take in information is detrimental. Sure, I will agree that most of the people checking their Facebook profiles and Twitter accounts every second aren't doing anything more than simply networking, gossiping or spouting every random thought they have, but how is that new? We can just do it faster. Before we had the Internet you would do the same thing when you went to the bar, called up a friend, wrote a letter or went to a social club. You would listen, talk, yell, voice your opinion, force your opinion, verbally attack, physically attack, defend yourself, laugh, cry, complain, beg, taunt, cheer, meet new friends, despise new enemies, flirt, date and ultimately, consume. You can worry about what you say and how you might affect people, or you can not care at all. Now it's instant and without the need for a filter. You can post every thought you have and share it with the world, right away. As someone interested in social movements, journalism and humanity in general I couldn't ask for a better time to be alive. Information spreads like wildfire. An opinion can spread and grow and turn into a general way of thinking in a matter of days.  A flood in Asia will be known about all over the world in a matter of minutes and I can let all my friends know what I'm eating for dinner in seconds. I could probably turn this into a whole discussion about my opinions on social and political globalization but this was a simple prompt to get me writing again. Job well done. Maybe I'll write more on it later.

Thoughts?